Into the Deep...

“A video showing a teenage girl being flogged by Taliban fighters has emerged from the Swat Valley in Pakistan, offering a shocking glimpse of militant brutality in the once-peaceful district, and a sign of Taliban influence spreading deeper into the country.

The two-minute video, shot using a mobile phone, shows a burka-clad woman face down on the ground. Two men hold her arms and feet while a third, a black-turbaned fighter with a flowing beard, whips her repeatedly.

"Please stop it," she begs, alternately whimpering or screaming in pain with each blow to the backside. "Either kill me or stop it now."

…

After 34 lashes the punishment stops and the wailing woman is led into a stone building, trailed by a Kalashnikov-carrying militant.

Reached by phone, Taliban spokesman Muslim Khan claimed responsibility for the flogging. "She came out of her house with another guy who was not her husband, so we must punish her. There are boundaries you cannot cross," he said. He defended the Taliban's right to thrash women shoppers who were inappropriately dressed, saying it was permitted under Islamic law.

…

Minallah and other sources said the girl was punished on suspicion of having had an illicit relationship with a married man. She did not receive a trial. "The whole case is based on the suspicions of one neighbour," said Minallah.

The woman's brother is among the men pinning her down, she added. "It's symbolic that he does it with his own hands. It gives him honour in local society, that he has done it for the sake of religion."

The Swat Valley is controlled by Maulana Fazlullah, a charismatic preacher who initially gained popularity through radio broadcasts, then seized control through gun battles, suicide attacks and intimidation of the local population.

Since the peace deal, women have been beaten for shopping unaccompanied in Mingora's main market and dozens of girls' schools remain closed, many of them bombed.

Fazlullah has sworn loyalty to Baitullah Mehsud, the overall Taliban leader from South Waziristan who claimed responsibility for last Monday's eight-hour assault on a police centre in Lahore and has vowed to mount attacks in Washington.

…

The effective surrender of government authority in Swat has caused great alarm across Pakistan and among western allies.Minallah said she feared Talibanisation would spread across Pakistan. "I have distributed this video because I feel people are in denial. They don't want to believe what is happening."”

Full text: http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2009/apr/02/taliban-pakistan-justice-women-flogging

Many people, soldiers included, disagree with the original impetus of the wars in both Iraq and Afghanistan. But it is for reasons such as these that the war in Afghanistan has taken a new course supported even by new governments in a number of contributing nations (America, the UK, Australia, among others). This is not the perpetuation of Bush’s war-mongering. This is a struggle to establish a stable government and prevent human rights abuses in a country which has for decades been rife with civil war. It is simply unfortunate that the new government chooses to enact laws which allow men to rape their wives. But as the above article shows, allowing the Taliban to control Afghanistan will be far from an improvement. This is not the middle ages. Public corporal punishment without trial should not be condoned. Pakistan needs to realise that these actions will not be tolerated, and permitting the Taliban to institute this kind of rule within districts of their nation won’t simply be accepted by the rest of the world. At least in Afghanistan the new laws are on paper and will follow particular proceedings, and as a stable democratic government the rest of the world can express their disapproval and try and discuss issues. The Taliban have no interest in political discourse unless it involves our surrender.

We have an obligation to protect human rights. This is not true Muslim law. This is distorted extremist ideology. If a woman submits to it, that may be her decision. But it should not be imposed on any person against their will. This is why we fight.

It really doesn't get much more badass than cold-blooded murder and a good old fashioned cover-up. Of course, we're not sure if sand really classifies as a cover-up by normal standards, but back in those days it was as good as they had. Moses really was a king. He was truly badass. Like a Ninja. But Jewish. We could say that Moses is a Ninjew. Truly awesome.


II Kings 2:23-24
 23 From there Elisha went up to Bethel. As he was walking along the road, some youths came out of the town and jeered at him. "Go on up, you baldhead!" they said. "Go on up, you baldhead!"
24 He turned around, looked at them and called down a curse on them in the name of the LORD. Then two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the youths.

We've all been there. We're walking down the street, minding our own business, when somebody starts hurling insults. Most of us would ignore them, maybe throw a few insults back, or flip them the bird. Elisha, on the other hand, decided to flip them a couple of bears. These bears, at the command of God and through him at the command of Elisha, then mauled the youths. It's a little sketchy on how many youths there were in the first place, but there sure as hell can't be too many left now. That'll teach them to call someone like Elisha a baldhead!


Judges 3:16-23
16 Now Ehud had made a double-edged sword about a foot and a half long, which he strapped to his right thigh under his clothing.
17 He presented the tribute to Eglon king of Moab, who was a very fat man.
18 After Ehud had presented the tribute, he sent on their way the men who had carried it.
19 At the idols near Gilgal he himself turned back and said, "I have a secret message for you, O king."
      The king said, "Quiet!" And all his attendants left him.
20 Ehud then approached him while he was sitting alone in the upper room of his summer palace and said, "I have a message from God for you." As the king rose from his seat,
21 Ehud reached with his left hand, drew the sword from his right thigh and plunged it into the king's belly.
22 Even the handle sank in after the blade, which came out his back. Ehud did not pull the sword out, and the fat closed in over it.
23 Then Ehud went out to the porch ; he shut the doors of the upper room behind him and locked them.

When I first was reading this, I wasn't sure if it had anything on Moses' efforts mentioned earlier. Then when it finally sank in (good pun, eh?), I realised this was a true display of pure badassness. He sent the sword all the way into the morbidly obese king's belly, including the handle (while he was still holding it nonetheless!), and then left it there? He then followed this up by politely closing and locking the doors on his way out. Manners, people, is the key. We can all learn from Ehud.


Ezekiel 23:19-20
19 Yet she became more and more promiscuous as she recalled the days of her youth, when she was a prostitute in Egypt.
20 There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.

Okay, so this really isn't too badass. But I figured we'd continue the analogy from the start with Leonidas and the Spartans. Come on, if you liked the movie 300 based off Frank Miller's comic, then this should be right down your alley. Sexual promiscuity all round. And not just sex, but sex with well-endowed men whose ejaculation could rival the annual flooding of the Nile. The internet may be for porn - but it's still got nothing on the Bible. Before we move on, however, I would like to have a moment of silence. Let us honour the Egyptians who dared not have the enjoyment of a blowjob at risk of drowning their lovers. We honour you, our well-hung badass brethren!


Numbers 16:31-33
31 As soon as [the LORD] finished saying all this, the ground under them split apart
32 and the earth opened its mouth and swallowed them, with their households and all Korah's men and all their possessions.
33 They went down alive into the grave, with everything they owned; the earth closed over them, and they perished and were gone from the community.

We can only speculate whether the earth was similar to the Sarlacc in Star Wars or whether it did or didn't make the "OM NOM NOM" noise as it devoured Korah and his merry band of men. We can't know for certain, but it seems likely. I'm really not sure what else I need to say here. It takes a seriously crazy bastard to set the very earth to eating hundreds of people. Seriously crazy, but also seriously badass.


1 Kings 18:24, 38-40
24 Then you call on the name of your god, and I will call on the name of the LORD. The god who answers by fire—he is God."
      Then all the people said, "What you say is good."
...
38 Then the fire of the LORD fell and burned up the sacrifice, the wood, the stones and the soil, and also licked up the water in the trench.
39 When all the people saw this, they fell prostrate and cried, "The LORD -he is God! The LORD -he is God!"
40 Then Elijah commanded them, "Seize the prophets of Baal. Don't let anyone get away!" They seized them, and Elijah had them brought down to the Kishon Valley and slaughtered there.

It's probably worth noting that Elisha (mentioned earlier summoning bears to maul the mocking youths) was disciple and attendant of Elijah (seen here having people who disagree with him slaughtered). Perhaps this is part of God's training. If you can't fuck people up, you just ain't holy enough. Theological debate in cafes is all well and good, but at the end of the day, you gotta worship the God who can set you on fire. And if you don't, the Pope is gonna give you an ass-whooping! Watch out!


Judges 15:15-16
15 Finding a fresh jawbone of an ass, he grabbed it and struck down a thousand men.
16 Then Samson said,
       "With an ass's jawbone
       I have made asses of them.
       With an ass's jawbone
       I have killed a thousand men."

I know some of you were impressed with Rambo or the Spartans. But nothing compares to Samson. In fact, the Bible has a whole host of heroes far superior to the Greeks and Spartans. I didn't want to bore you with all the stories, so I just gave you the best. We also have Josheb-Basshebeth, who in 2 Samuel 23:8, "... raised his spear against eight hundred men, whom he killed in one encounter.". Also featuring on the list is Anath from Judges 3:31 who "struck down six hundred Philistines with an oxgoad." An oxgoad is effectively a cow-prod. You know, a stick for herding the oxen. So we have Josheb-Basshebeth who slaughtered 800 men with a spear, or Anath who mangled 600 of his enemies with an oxgoad. But none of this compares to Samson. Not only did he brutalise a mighty 1000 trained soldiers, but he did it with the jaw of a donkey. That's right, when he saw a legion of soldiers coming at him, he did not turn tail and run. He tore apart the skull of a donkey, took in hand its jawbone, and went to town. Rambo's kill count doesn't even come close. And the Spartans had armour, spears, a defensive position and each other. Anybody can fight when in a phalanx with spears - but fighting soldiers all alone with a piece of animal carcass? Badass doesn't even begin to describe that!



What have we learned today, kiddies? We've learned that 300 is child's play. We've learned that Rambo is a walk in the park. We've learned that when you want the truly epic, when you want to see a real badass in action, you want the Bible!

Modern Greeks have a love of big claims to fame. They always brag about what they invented or how they are the greatest at this or that. This is all well and good, but how much of it is actually true? Today we are going to take a close look at one of the greatest battles of our time - Greeks VS History. Who will win? Will the Greeks manage to support their insane claims, or shall what actually happened in History reign supreme with its archaeological evidence and actual truth? It's going to be close, that's for sure. Now without any further adieu, let us begin!

“Greeks invented language.”

This is a claim made to me today which started this whole thing. It also came with a few other absurd claims, but this is the one which took my eye the most. Apparently the ancient Greeks invented language themselves, and it did not exist before them. How amusing. 

Language is a tricky subject when we go right back to its beginnings in history. There are a number of theories, but we don’t necessarily need to consider the very beginning – only the very earliest we know of. There are any number I could mention, but I’m going to emphasise one in particular. Proto-Indo-European is the hypothetical (but commonly accepted) ancestor of the Indo-European languages. The Indo-European languages include English, Italian, Hindi, Portuguese, Russian, Spanish, German, French, Latin, Greek and a whole bunch more. But wait, what was that last one? Greek?

You heard me. Greek is part of the Indo-European language group, meaning that it developed from a different language and also there are other languages which developed from that common ancestor, of which Greek had no impact on. Can the Greeks really have invented language if their very own language descended from a different language? Of course not! How absurd!

This doesn’t stop the Greeks from bragging about their language-invention capabilities. They often decide to go to “Greeks basically invented English” or “Most English words come from Greek”. There is an amusing scene in the film ‘My Big Fat Greek Wedding’ which satirises this habit of Greeks. Is this a valid claim though? Once again, no.

Let’s look at the history of the English language. It all began 5^th Century AD. Three Germanic tribes invaded Britain – the Angles, the Saxons and the Jutes. At the time, the Brits were speaking a Celtic language. Most of them got pushed out, however, but there was still influence there. These three tribes all spoke a similar language and formed together, with the influence of that Celtic language, to become what is known as Old English. There were also massive influences by Latin, especially when Christianity became popular, as well as Old Norse due to frequent Viking invasions. Later in 1066, the Normans came and invaded, bringing Old French into the mix. With this conquest, a lot of nobles started speaking the Old French while commoners kept with Old English. Eventually in the 14^th Century, Old English took back its dominance but the French was not lost – together they became Middle English. Some general changes (though significant) occurred over time to get our current English. We see from this that English was originally a mix of a Germanic language, a bit of Celtic, and a lot of Old French.

Does Greek fit into any of this at all? Not directly. Greek influence only came in after the Renaissance, and predominantly it was for scientific terms. There is however a heavy indirect influence through Latin. Latin evolved from three main sources – Celtic dialects, the Etruscan language, and Greek. So in that respect, we do take a fair bit from Greek due to the fact we take a fair bit from Latin. However, is it fair to attribute English to Greece? No. We have two options. We either say those words come from Latin, or we say they come from Proto-Indo-European which is the furthest back we can trace it. Claiming that Greeks invented language or played a predominant role in developing English is just ego-boosting.

“Greeks invented maths.”

Another one from today, and a very common one. This is going to be the easiest for me to refute – did Greeks really invent mathematics?

The oldest mathematical texts are Plimpton 322, the Moscow Mathematical Papyrus, the Rhind Mathematical Papyrus, and the Shulba Sutras. The interesting thing about this is, none of them are Greek. Their location and approximate dates respectively are, Babylonia 1900BC, Egypt 1850BC, Egypt 1650BC and India 800BC. How odd that none of this is Greek. But more amusing is the content of these texts. A lot of it concerns what is known as Pythagoras’ Theorem. Pythagoras lived around 500-580BC, and is credited with discovering this theory. Yet apparently it easily predated his life in Babylonia, Egypt and India. Oh dear, should we really be giving credit to the Greeks? How much more existed before them yet which they claim as their own?

The history of maths goes back far beyond Greece. There are drawings and markings that indicate a knowledge of mathematics which can be dated to up to 70,000 BC. There is a bone tool which has been discovered and dated to 20,000 BC. Markings on the bone have been interpreted to show knowledge of prime numbers, multiplication, division, and other basic mathematical calculations.

Progressively more complex mathematics have been found in Babylonia, Egypt and India before Greece got started. Chinese mathematics has been observed at around the same time as Greece, as has more complex Indian mathematics. So for the Greeks to claim to have invented maths is obviously absurd. Nobody is doubting that they did not make significant developments (of course, we are definitely refuting the Pythagorean Theorem as being Greek) – but far more significant developments have been made in North America and other areas of Europe in the past few centuries. This certainly doesn’t mean they invented maths.

“Greeks invented science.”

Another of the classics from today. This is a complicated topic due to the broadness of the term science, however its broadness also makes it easier to refute. Could Greece really have invented science? Doubtful.

The best way to identify science is by the scientific method. The scientific method was pioneered by the Arab Muslim scientist Ibn al-Haytham in the 11^th century. His method is the earliest form of what can today be seen as the scientific method. If we look further back, we do see some form of scientific method in Ancient Greece, and quite prominently.

At first glance, it may seem as if the Greeks did invent this science. However, unfortunately, Egypt comes away as the winner once again. The Edwin Smith papyrus and the Ebers papyrus are both Egyptian medical texts dated around 1600BC. They show early components of the scientific method and have detailed information about anatomy and medical procedures such as surgery. Even today, medicine is one of the most scientific fields.

Every culture for thousands of years has shown evidence of scientific thought. Coming to conclusions about reality based on observation of the world around you is what science is. In the earliest of cultures, religion and science were the same thing. To suggest that Greece, which has easily been predated by other cultures, invented science is just ridiculous. Again, they may have made substantial developments – but progress is not invention.

“Greeks were the greatest warriors.”

This is the last of the ones put forth today, and easily the hardest to debate. What makes a great warrior? If we say that the greatest warrior is one who can beat all others in a 1v1 fight, it is going to be damned near impossible to judge. After all, Greece could have had one incredibly great warrior who could defeat all others, and then a few decades later Persia had another great warrior who was exactly the same. Without having them both fight, how do we judge? And just because there is one great warrior, doesn’t make all of their warriors great.

I think the best way to look at this, is by pointing out that although Greece had a pretty good track record of battles – do they really compare to some of the great conquering Empires? Romans and Persians come to mind. The Roman Empire, at its peak, controlled a landmass of 5,900,000 km². The Persian Empire, at the height of its power, spanned across three continents and encompassed approximately 7,500,000 km². The greatest of all (bar the British Empire), was the Mongol Empire which spanned an incredible distance of over 33,000,000 km² and ruled over an estimated population of 100 million people. Surely it is an Empire which can control so great an area which must have some of the greatest warriors?

Of course, a common response to this is “the Persians tried to take us on, and lost! SPARTA! 300! RAAWWRRR!!!!” I have a sad story for you all, my friends – the reason that Greece beat the Persians had nothing to do with good warriors. The decisive battle was actually a naval battle on the sea. The Persians basically dominated Greece for most of the Greco-Persian War up until the Battle of Salamis. While the Battle of Thermopylae apparently shows the greatness of Spartan warriors, it should be noted that much of their survival can be attributed to far greater equipment as well as terrain.

Spartans were armed with bronze armour and shields and longer spears. The Persians had far shorter spears which made it harder to approach the enemy, and their shields were wicker and easily penetrated or destroyed. The narrow pass forced the Persians to attack with a number closer to that of the Spartans, removing their advantage of superior numbers. This does not prove the greatness of the Spartan warriors – it merely shows greater equipment and fortunate terrain at the battle site.

After defeating the Persian fleet at the Battle of Salamis, the Greeks made a counter-attack. While at first it was somewhat successful, it was no more so than the initial Persian invasion of Greece. Ultimately they were defeated, and the entire war ended with peace treaties. Is it fair to really say Greeks were clearly such great warriors? They displayed no significant supremacy over the Persians who, though having superior numbers in some battles, had far inferior equipment.

Alexander the Great and his army were surely powerful, showing success similar to that of the Persians and Romans. But at the same time, Genghis Khan and his Mongols are some of the fiercest warriors known in history and dominated a far greater area. Perhaps they were the greatest warriors? Or what about the samurai of Feudal Japan? Though there was no conquering empire here; that was due to the fact the entire country was at war with itself. You grew up knowing that the lands you lived on were always at threat of being invaded by a neighbouring Daimyo who wanted more territory and ultimately all of Japan. This went on for centuries – surely the Samurai must be devastating to live in such a time?

To call any army as the greatest warriors ever is ridiculous and completely unfounded. Nobody can deny the courage and savageness of the Spartans. But at the same time, the Roman Legionaries were far more disciplined and tactical, which is a very important requirement for a warrior. And the Mongols were just as savage, and I would not hesitate to say that all warriors who lived in those centuries long past were courageous beyond belief – as are our soldiers of today. Making such a big claim is just absurd and only done by the ignorant who want to feel better about themselves by speaking big of people they have no relation to except that they are distantly related by nationality.

There is, however, a claim that the Greeks can make about their warriors. “They were gay!” Take a look at the Sacred Band of Thebes – an elite Greek warrior force consisting entirely of homosexual lovers. This was not an isolated event, homosexual love within Greek militaries was quite common, and has been discussed by a number of Greek historians and philosophers – Aristotle, Plato, Phaedrus, Plutarch, Athenaeus, Aristophanes and Xenophon. Some of the greatest Greeks in history have been speculated to be gay. Alexander the Great and one of his top generals Hephaestion were allegedly lovers. Harmodius and Aristogiton were credited with bringing about Athenian democracy, and were also lovers. This goes quite beyond the military, in fact. Look into the concept of eromenos.

“Greeks invented philosophy.”

I come across this one a lot, almost as often as the invention of maths one. It is just as easy to refute, as well.

Let me lay it down straight away – the history of Western philosophy began in Greece. Yes. It did. HOWEVER… not all philosophy was invented by the Greeks. Eastern philosophy not only doesn’t trace itself to Greece, but actually predates it!

Indian schools of philosophy can be considered to be the oldest schools of philosophy, beating Greek philosophy by almost 500 years. The oldest texts, the Brhadaranyaka and Chandogya Upanishads have been dated to about 900 BC or later. Confucianism is the oldest school of philosophy in China, developing at around the same time as Buddhism and Jainism developed in India. Taoism developed in China a little later around 200 BC.

In comparison, Western philosophy begins in Greece with Thales of Miletus. He was said to have been active around 585BC, which is a couple of centuries later than the Upanishads showed up in India. The main Greek philosophers such as Aristotle, Plato and Socrates were all around 300BC and later. As you can see, this all takes place after the Eastern philosophy. So while the Greeks may have begun formal philosophical thought in the West, they certainly did not invent all philosophy. In fact, you may argue that philosophy has existed for as long as we have asked questions – and that has been for as long as man could think.

“Greeks helped develop Australia.”

The person who made the first four claims also made this one to me a while ago. Everyone I’ve said this to so far has just laughed outright. Let me put it simply with a few dates up until the 1980’s.

Australia first settled by Europeans – 1788
Gold rush began – 1851
Eureka stockade rebellion – 1854
Federation of Australia – 1901
Australia in World War 1 – 1914-1918
Australia in World War 2 – 1939-1945
Statute of Westminster adopted (ended lots of constitutional links to Britain) – 1942
Australia in the Korean War – 1950
Melbourne hosted Summer Olympics – 1956
Australia in the Vietnam War – 1962-1973
White Australia Policy abolished – 1973
Australia Act passed (breaks almost all constitutional links to Britain) - 1986

Now, here’s the history of Greek settlement:

7 Greek convicts from Britain (the first Greeks in Australia) – 1829
Groups of Greeks in significant numbers during gold rush – 1850s
878 Greeks recorded in census – 1901
12,291 Greeks recorded in census – 1947
160,200 Greeks recorded in census – 1971
375,703 Greeks recorded in census – 2001
365,147 Greeks recorded in census – 2006

Considering that the number of people in the 2006 census was 19,855,292; that makes Greeks only 1.8% of the 2006 population. Similarly, the 2001 census had 18,769,249 people and therefore Greeks made up 2.0% of the 2001 population. It is unknown why there were more responses of Greek Australians in 2001 than 2006, but that is what census reported. If we consider how low this percentage is, and how much lower it would be earlier on with only 12,291 Greeks at the end of World War 2, I think it becomes apparent how amusing it is to claim that Greeks played a significant developmental role in Australia. After all, most significant events in Australia’s history and development was World War II and earlier, or at the latest perhaps in the 70s and late 80s when we remove the White Australia Policy and our links to Britain. It is only in the past decade or so that Greeks have become particularly prevalent, and there is certainly no evidence to suggest they played any significant role in our history, let alone “helped develop Australia”.

The Counter-Claims!
I have now dealt with a lot of claims made by Greeks about how great they were or are. I have refuted these, and now it is time for me to make a few counter-claims for other ancient civilisations:

The Chinese invented paper, gunpowder, the idea of paper money,
The Sumerians invented the wheel
Mesopotamia and Ancient Egypt was home to the first significant practice of agriculture and consequently responsible for the beginnings of the Neolithic Revolution. Similarly, evidence of irrigation can be found in these areas as far back as the 6^th millennium BC.
The earliest writing system was developed in Sumer, and the first alphabet was developed in Ancient Egypt.
The Indus Valley civilizations invented urban sanitation and sewerage systems, while China invented toilet paper.
Sumer is responsible for our use of a base 6 system of time (60 seconds, 60 minutes, 12 hours and 12 months) as well as for the 360 degrees of a circle, 12 inches in a foot, and the unit “dozen” as 12.

And obviously this is without touching modern inventions and discoveries which there are so many of nowadays, most of which have been coming out of America. Oddly enough, the Greeks haven’t done anything for a few centuries now, have they? Makes you think, doesn't it. And thus ends my analysis of the battle of Greeks VS History. Unfortunately, it seems that History has won out. Let this be a lesson to you all - although they say that history is written by the victors, the victors cannot obliterate all evidence of the truth, and ultimately it is truth which reigns victorious over all.

There was a man who lived with lots of other people. Everyone there thought he was crazy, for all day long he would pry into everyone's affairs and ask all sorts of nonsensical questions. He pestered everyone unmercifully, thus they all wished he'd leave.

One day a young man came to the house and began asking lots of ridiculous questions; and so one old man decided to speak up, for he felt that they were generous enough to let one crazy man live among them, and they certainly didn't want another. So he said, "Look here young fellow, what are all these stupid questions you're asking; are you crazy like the other fellow?"

The young man replied, "Which person do you mean?"

"Why that loony over there wearing the fancy uniform," said the old man.

The young man laughed while saying, "You mean that you don't know he's a doctor and you're all patients in a sanitarium?"

"The term geek has acquired a patina," says Holkins, a writer prone to ornate verbiage and renowned for his witty blog posts that accompany each strip. He's right — the word is being reclaimed as a badge of pride. But the creators of Penny Arcade aren't among these geek-come-latelies. They're unreconstructed geeks of the old-school variety — which is to say, of the high school variety.

Krahulik has glasses, a beanpole physique, and a touch of overbite that gives him a pained expression. Holkins, who also wears glasses, is balding and so pale that he looks like he could get moonburns. Growing up, they were the prototypical misfits, ostracized by the cool kids at school. Holkins claims that he owes his success to those formative encounters with jocks and their lacrosse sticks. "I've been repaid a thousand times over for the damage they inflicted," he says cheerfully.

Krahulik agrees. "One time in high school, someone broke into my locker and stole my stuff, so I had to wear gym clothes for the rest of the day," he says, wincing at the memory. "I developed humor as a defense mechanism. Now I drive a fucking Mercedes."

I found it amusing. I'm not going to drag this on with extensive analysis, so we'll just leave it with this - funny how when we are kids, the top of the ladder is the "cool" people, typically the sporty guys or "jocks". When you become adults, being on top is more closely associated with success in business and accumulating capital gain and wealth - it's usually the guys on the bottom during school who end up at the top of the ladder here. Sure, we still hold that special little place of reverence for the sporting heroes - but on the whole it seems to turn around. How many of you who were/are the popular athletes in school are actually going to become big sports-stars? Probably none.

Full article here:
http://www.wired.com/gaming/virtualworlds/magazine/15-09/mf_pennyarcade
Penny Arcade here:
http://www.penny-arcade.com